Thursday, July 26, 2012

[JAPAN 2012] Sayapinky's guide to living cheap in Tokyo (for girls)

Disclaimer: This is purely for fun, don't take any of it seriously. Really.


you're finally in Tokyo!
Oh, how long have you waited for this.
Saved up money, begged your parents to give you an early birthday present to support your upcoming shopping-sprees, made long lists of stuff you want to see, places you want to go and foods you want to eat.

Problem is, Tokyo is expensive.

Really expensive.

After you've gone crazy in Shibuya 109 once or twice, being fooled by the cute little girls screaming "TIME SALE! 50% OFF!", raided one convenience store after the other and had five meals a day at different delicious restaurants, your wallet is crying loudly.

This is where you need

Sayapinky's guide to living cheap in Tokyo

(for girls)

(Sorry guys, there's just not as many horny women out there......)

This is a guide considering of eight (more or less) easy steps that will secure your loss of all dignity but get you a couple of free meals or more, depending on how far you are willing to go!


Step one:

Do not do this on your own. Bring a friend. It's much more fun, and being picked up by weird old men is a little less scary if you're not on your own. Of course, if you like to play it risky, then YOLO, go by yourself.

Step two:
Make-up is your friend.
Make your eyes look big. The bigger they are, the more foreign you look, and the more they will want to date you. Ergo, the more stuff they will pay for you.

Like this:

Remember, the bigger, the better. Think of a bug and aim for that.

Step three:

Buy a bunch of cute looking clothes. They will love you forever. It doesn't matter if all the Japanese girls weigh a third of your bodyweight and carry the clothes so much better than you. You're foreign. You will always be cuter.

Step four:

Place yourself in some extremely random place on the street. It could be next to a guy in a full-body catsuit dancing weirdly to make people enter a girl's bar. If so, make sure to dance along with the cat and show the world what a happy, cute personality you have.

Step five:

Sit on your random spot for a long time just chilling. Remember to be much more appealing than the people hanging out around you looking like life sucks.
When people come up to you and try to make you go drink with them, turn down the young ones. They have no money. They will not pay stuff for you. They only want to get in your pants. They are a no-go.

However, when cheery men at a decent age (no, not 60+. They may be rich, but that reaches the border of sugardaddy) ask you to go do random stuff (this will include bowling, speaking from personal experience), agree to go. If they have Armani suits and Chanel bags, consider your mission a success. Expensive sushi has been secured.

I mean...

Dignity < Sushi
Step six:

Speak in Japanese to them. It's OK if you only can say a little. They will almost shit themselves and think you are the smartest, most charming being on the planet.

Step seven:

Laugh cutely at everything they say and make sure to be way more humble than you should. It's cute. They will love you.
If you laugh at their weird suggestions and stupid jokes, they will think you are even cuter than they already do. Remember you're foreign. That you're stupid is just because you're a foreigner. You are cute.

Step eight:

Enjoy when they invite you out for sushi. Enjoy when they compliment how cute and foreign and big your eyes are. You have succeeded, and you can now spend all of your money on useless stuff like make-up and way too small clothes that you don't need. You have now officially gotten yourself a pimp.

Feel free to get more than just one. The richer, the better.


remember following this guide will greatly decrease your dignity and you might seem remotely skanky.


then again, you might actually make friends from this.


but okay, you might also meet a bunch of creepers. (this is sadly much more likely than the above)

Monday, July 23, 2012

I'm still aliiiive!!

Hi guys!

How's it going?

I'm great. Still enjoying my time here, despite two-faced Japanese people who obviously needs some hobbies.
More about that later.

 It might be included in a post I'm thinking of making. "Sayapinky's guide to living really cheap in Tokyo (for girls)". It's gonna be just as ridiculous as it sounds, yes.

Anyhow, sorry for not following up on my host-adventures or anything, but currently I have pretty limited access to internet. I got to Okinawa last Wednesday and have been hanging out with people most of the time ever since. That includes my friend's grandma, who's a tiny, very old woman with a lot of energy. She also speaks Okinawa-dialect, which sometimes sounds pretty funny and I understand absolutely nothing.

But, as of right now, I have limited access to internet (not to mention time to be online), and am not able to transfer pictures from my phone to the computer, so I can't really show you guys anything interesting. I don't know when I'll be able to, but maybe my adventures in the Land of the Rising Sun won't be documented until I'm home in another three weeks (gasp!).

But well... Before I left Tokyo, I got to take some pictures of the nails I had done there. So. Here you are. Nails:

Aren't they cute? I wanted them glittery and not over-the-top, 'cause I am extremely dependent on the use of my hands. And the use of my hands means I will never have super-long nails. I wouldn't know how to go the restroom if I had some anyway....

Well.... That's all I really have to write here.
PS. I'm really hungry, but I gained fricking 4 kilos the past 3 weeks. It's crazy!! Can't believe I still fit my clothes..... wth.

Friday, July 13, 2012

[JAPAN 2012] ホスト見・Host-looking (loads of text.......) pt. 1

Hi people♡

How are you doing?

I hope you're enjoying summer just as much as I am. As soon as it's not raining here, it's really fricking hot, haha. And I know it's only gonna get worse from now on, especially when I'll be going to Okinawa. I might just die.

If I do, tell my mom and dad I like them.
And my dog.
I like my dog too.

Well, I thought about making all my posts here in Japan chronological, but.....

If I did, I'd be making one heck of a lot of posts about shopping and staring at hosts (seriously, it's my new most favorite hobby. ever.).

So instead, I'll just write, well, whatever I want.

Here goes!!

I bet you all know already, but in case there's some innocent people left out there in the world, I'll just make a quick introduction to hosts.

Basically, it's guys ranging from super-duper-extremely-I'd-do-you-anyday-hot to wtf-u-doin looking guys standing on basically every street corner from around 9pm every night trying to pick up desperate girls who'd like the hosts to treat them as princesses for one night.

Sounds like hookers?
Are they hookers?
Definitely not.

yes this is a completely unrelated picture, but I don't have any related
pics right now, and if there wasn't any pics in this blog post,
it would kill you. I swear.

They are, as the name sort of implies, hosts. Guys who earn money from sitting with you trying to get you drunk (that way their "shop" as they call it (read: bar) earns more money you see) while entertaining you as much as possible and doing their best to treat you like a princess to make you wanna stay longer or even come back again.

Or at least that's what I know.
So far.

We decided to skip Disneyland and go to a hostbar sometime before my friend leaves, so I'll tell you in details later.

You want to read this. I totally know you do.

Anyhow, the way the hosts go about it is that whenever a girl or a group of girls passes by them, they go up to them and asks like if they're busy or if they wouldn't wanna go to the hostclub 'cause it's "soooo cheap" and they'd have an awesome time and blablabla.
The hosts aren't making any money unless they get customers, so one would think they're trying pretty hard to get some, right?

Not in Ikebukuro!

Half of the time they're just lurking on the corners just texting on their phones looking like the really, really don't like life.

But it's super fun watching them, so lately me and my friend have spent basically every night sitting on a fence close to where the hosts are, cheering for them going like "GO GET HERRRRRR!!!!", "NO TRY HARDER", "awwww, rejected again..", "SMILE MORE", "omg bitch try harder!" etcetera etcetera...

It might sound ridiculous, and believe me, it really is.
 But it's also really fun, especially 'cause we're kind of trolling the hosts.

You see, two young, foreign girls in pretty much full make-up with our big, pretty foreign eyes (coughcirclelensescough) and oh-so-cute-outfits really attract a lot of attention. Mostly from really drunk guys in their late thirties going like "herrroooo wherre arrre uuu fwom?" and then almost shitting themselves when I reply in Japanese.

this means that we get hit on at least three times in an hour, meaning we totally do the hosts job better than they do, and we're trying (if that's even possible) even less than they do.

hahahahaha, owned.

I even said to one of the hosts (we keep forgetting to ask for his name, so right now we're just calling him "buddy") that we're kind of beating them, and he made a supersad face and went like "....I quit."

In the beginning, we were kind of just circling around Ikebukuro being really desperate and embarrassed and probably the hosts were all like "wtffff", but eventually we picked out a place somewhere close to them and figured that since they were standing on the street all night, we were in our full rights to stare shamelessly at them.

And after doing that for three days, they not only try to make us come into their clubs (where the first one will be like "it's so cheap! Only 10.000 yen!" and then 10 minutes later another one will go "It's only 1500 yen!" and the latest bid was 1000 yen. We're wondering when they'll start offering to pay us for going...), they actually start talking to us whenever they're bored (OK, not whenever, 'cause that's basically all the time). It's pretty cool.

Seeing as we're enjoying this waaay to much to quit, I'm aiming at ending up befriending them. Please cross your fingers for me.

To be continued!

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

[JAPAN 2012] ただいま、東京!・Tokyo, I'm home!

Hi guys! (^∇^)
Long time no see!

I'm sorry I haven't written anything in a while, but I've been really busy the past week after I finally felt Japanese ground under my feet again!

I'm currently staying at a hotel in Ikebukuro with a friend, and we had the longest flight ever. We left home the night before our flight departed, 'cause we were afraid we wouldn't make it if we took the morning train. Ergo, we spent almost 10 hours in the airport, then 3 hours to Vienna, then 10,5 hours to Narita. And the flight to Narita was ... so... fricking.... long.
 I kept falling asleep and then waking up only to realize I'd been sleeping for like 30 minutes and we were still crossing Russia.

Russia, y u so big??

But but but but...

we finally landed.

Tokyo, I'm home!!

I actually ended up weeping like a little baby as soon as we landed, 'cause it's just been so long and I missed it so much here. I really feel like I'm back home.

The first day we were obviously super tired after not having slept properly for what must've been almost 48 hours, so when we got to Ikebukuro and checked in at our hotel (Kimi Ryokan, it's really recommendable!) around noon, we decided to just spend the day in Ikebukuro and check out the neightbourhood.

Of course that included introducing my friend to some Japanese food( ̄ー ̄)
So we went for Okonomiyaki in Sunshine City, a pretty big shopping mall in Ikebukuro, and the waitress there apparently really liked us, 'cause we got free ice cream for dessert.
It was so good, I tell you.
My friend also said about it what she's said about almost everything she's tasted ever since

"this is a hit."

and that's basically how it's been ever since.

I have looooads more to tell, but I'm going to split it up into seperate posts.
But I can tell you that we've been shopping a lot, and we've been spending the evenings cheering for the hosts in Ikebukuro (this will include a really funny story!), and we've been treated to bowling and sushi by a group of rather suspicious looking guys who turned out to be the sweetest people ever.

So... stay tuned (:

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